Farting 3D Model Job (Week 3)
Over the weekend, my best buddy and his wife had an emergency situation and so they called me to ask me if I could please help babysit their two sons Tom and Jerry – ages 2 and 4. In return, they promised to commission a 3d model from me worth $300. So I thought it was quite a good deal and accepted. I said to myself that a few hours of baby sitting their two cute kids can’t be that difficult especially since I usually played with them whenever I visited my friend.
Little did I know that those little kids were like monsters in disguise? As soon as their parents left the 2 year old pooped on himself. First, he farted loudly while I was eating my sandwich and then just when I was about to complain about his bad manners he let out another loud farting sound and then there was this very bad smell. My initial plan was to leave him in his soiled diapers till his parents got back. But that was 3 hrs away and I was not sure I would survive the smell that long. Then the two kids started shouting, fighting throwing stuff, you name it… they did all the terrible things kids do to make my life a living hell for the 3 hrs I was with them.
By the time my buddy and his wife got back, I had them both in the closet to get some peace. This of course freaked out my buddy’s wife. Who even threatened to report me to the authorities even though I told her we were just playing hide and seek.
Anyway, I was just glad to get away after that exhausting ordeal and hit the clubs and bars to get me some action for the night…
On Wednesday, I got a call from architect John Murray. He wanted me to stop by his office to discuss a 3d modeling and rendering job. So I did. I arrived at his office just after lunch and met with him in a conference room. He showed me the architectural drawings that he wanted me to create in 3D as well as his ideas for an elaborate walk-through 3D animation.
Then he beckoned me over to his side of the table to look over his shoulders at his computer screen. As I leaned over, a very nasty smell hit my nose. I immediately drew back as I realized that architect John had just released some very nasty gas. However, he kept a straight face and did as if nothing had happened. So I held my breath trying to keep a straight face too while he talked on and on about the 3d model he wanted me to create for him. Then I swear I heard a hissing sound as he farted again! This time the smell was just too much for me so I told him that I had to use the bathroom and excused myself.
As I stepped out of the conference room, a beautiful lady with a company name badge that said Maria said hi to me. She said that if I did not mind she just wanted to have a quick word with the architect. I said that was fine I was just dashing to the rest room.
When I got back about 5 – 10 minutes later, Maria was just leaving the room. She thanked me for letting her talk to the Architect and that by the way I might want to see Dr Manuel on the first floor on my way out to help me with my digestive issues. I was stunned and did not know what to make of such a remark especially coming from such a nice looking lady. Then it dawned on me that she had walked into the room just as I was leaving and so must have smelled the nasty smell the architect had released from his silent fart. And the architect must have told her that it was me who did so and that was why I had to go to the restroom. What a sneaky bastard… I thought to myself.
I was about to go back in there and curse him out but then I remembered that this particular gig had the potential to pay quite a bit so I kept my mouth shut. Just before our meeting was over, the gawd darn architect farted again … another silent smelly fart. I was so irritated that I wanted to reach out and slap him. What sort of man does that and continues to keep a straight face.
As I was leaving, I ran into Maria again and told her that it was the architect that needed to see the Doctor about his digestive issues and not me. She smiled at me saying that she understood that it was an embarrassing subject for me and walked away.
On my way home the architect called to tell me that he did not think I was a good fit for the custom 3D modeling job we had just discussed. I said why… and then I heard Maria’s voice in the background and figured that she must have told him what I said.
Realizing that I had lost the job, I decided I had nothing to loose anymore and so said to the architect that yes, I agreed with him I was not the right person for the job as I could not work with a farting smelling architect and hung up on the gassy dude.
About Me: My name is Jon Max. I am a 3D Model Artist. I have decided to document my life. One week at a time and share it with you. It is reality TV but on a blog. You will get the truth, no sugar coating of events instead raw and unedited. It’s my life baby!